Friday, April 16, 2010

Thoughts Before Race Day

My mind is racing.

I have spent months training with this one goal in mind. Hell, I have had this goal since last October, but didn't start following a training plan until February. I have pushed myself through runs I never thought I could do. I will never forget the first time I ran 5 miles. I thought to myself when I was done, "There is NO WAY I can do a Half Marathon" That run took everything out of me. If it weren't for Gabe running by my side, encouraging me, pushing me, and most of all, BELIEVING in me, I don't know if I would have kept going. I tried to focus on why I set out to run in the first place. I wanted to accomplish something so huge for myself, but also run for a cause. If I could push myself everyday for a REASON, I knew I would find it in me to do this. I talked with family and friends about making donations to our Heart Group, Intermountain Healing Hearts if I ran this. I have raised money for a cause so close to my own heart, and I am running in memory of a little girl I never met, that would have been 10 years old this month. The image of her, and the HOPE she has given so many has been on my mind mile after mile, and I kept running. Before I knew it, I had run 8, 9, 10, even 12 miles!!..

"Who is this person?" I kept asking myself.
The answer was clear.
The person I always wanted to be........
correction,
the person I always knew I was,
but never gave her a chance to accomplish her goals
because I let self-doubt take over.
I am ready to let that person go. I want more than anything to live each day believing there is NOTHING I can not do. If I can tell my family, kids, husband and friends that they are awesome and CAN DO anything in life, why can't I believe that for myself? I am going to, because I deserve that. I deserve to see the Heather everyone else can see. So today, I will focus on how far I have come, and even more, how far I am going to go.
I have posted the course map. If anyone is in the area and want to cheer me on, I appreciate it more than I can say. Even if you can not do that, send good vibes my way, because the love and support of my family and friends pushes me to do my best at anything I take on.
See you tomorrow.....13.1 miles later.

2 comments:

  1. Heather,

    How fun! You and Gabe are awesome. You can do this. Good luck tomorrow. Sending good thoughts your way...

    Hugs & Prayers,
    Christina

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  2. Just want you to know I am very appreciative of the love you show to me and my family. I can't but think that Hope will be running with you tomorrow.

    (HUGS)
    Carolyn
    Hope's Mommy

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